My struggles with depression are not new. I've dealt with it in some form since early high school. However, these last couple of months have been the worst bout of depression I've ever had to deal with. Two of my most severe symptoms are wanting to sleep all the time, and having no interest in things I used to love.
Because I've been losing so much interest in hobbies and passions, my Bible reading and prayer has also been affected. I haven't done my daily bible reading for almost three weeks now. For a Christian, that's basically spiritual suicide. I'm feeling the affects of that spiritual suicide every day.
Not having a full relationship with God is affecting everything in life for me. I feel like simple problems that I could normally handle are getting blown out of proportion and taking over my life. It's become nearly impossible for me to even do simple tasks without becoming overwhelmed.
I hate that I've gotten to this point. I hate that I've let a monster like depression take over my life and basically ruin it for me. It has to stop. It will stop - now.
It's time to make a plan. I'm asking all of my readers to keep me accountable, alongside the people I see and live with every day. It's easy for me to make this plan, but it's hard to stick to it.
1. Read a chapter of Psalms every day
Psalms is so refreshing to read! There are so many reminders of how God cares for us even in that book alone. Reading it daily will refocus my mind on why God should be number one and how I can continue to see Him that way.
2. Pray as soon as I wake up, and before going to bed
I hope to pray more than this throughout the day, but starting with these two times will help to focus my mind into a more continuous conversation with God, rather than a forced assignment.
3. Spend a few minutes before bed talking with Nick each day about any doubts or problems I have
I don't voice my emotions and concerns as much as I should. I'm hoping this will encourage me to not bottle things up nearly as much.
These three goals are simple, but I know over time they will have huge positive results. I plan on including these goals in my monthly goal recaps as well, so within a few weeks I may some some progress to share with all of you!
Do you have any other suggestions for me? Do you have any specific verses that may help me?